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There are several factors to consider in the adoption of a child. It is entirely possible for infertile couples to go through periods of mourning over the inability to become pregnant and have a child with a biological connection.

Along those lines, the children who are adopted may mourn the loss of their birth parents. If the lines of communication are kept open in a healthy manner, it can help to diminish the feelings of loss and abandonment sometimes experienced by adopted children. In addition, acceptance of an adopted child’s desire to learn more or possibly seek out his or her birth parents, can allow for some degree of resolution of these feelings of loss.

Some difficulties may occur as the result of poor information at the time of the adoption. This is more common in international adoptions where certain elements may be missing or unreliable. For example, an adoptive parent may not receive accurate medical information about the health of the birthmother or child. The adoptive family may not discover until later that the adopted child has medical problems, such as developmental delays or congenital abnormalities. 

Emotional difficulties may result from the manner in which an adoption is handled. If the child is not told about his or her adoption until he or she is older, it can often lead to mistrust, insecurity and even anger on the child’s part. By not disclosing the information and talking about the adoption openly, the child may feel that this information is a secret or is bad, which may lead to negative feelings about being adopted.

Another potential pitfall associated with adoption is the significant amount of financial resources required from the prospective parents. The financial burden of adopting a child should be evaluated carefully before considering the process. With the increase in adoptions, many employers now offer some adoption reimbursement for related expenses, which may range between $2,000 and $10,000.

In addition, there is a $10,000 federal tax credit for adoption for households with incomes under $150,000 and an adjusted credit from those with incomes above $150,000. Additionally, some states offer tax credits for parents who adopt a child from a public adoption agency, and the military provides a one-time $2,000 reimbursement for adoption costs.