I was sexually abused as a child by my uncle as well as a male servant. I was around nine or 10 years old. I have never told anyone about this. I'm 20 now. Since I was 14 I have noticed that I can't be around people. I can't even have a decent conversation with my parents. I like to be alone most of the time. I have been in two relationships in which I've been cheated in the worst way. Now all I can do is sit in my room all day long. I don't feel like doing anything at all. There are times when I'm happy but that doesn't seem to last long. I don't know for sure, but I think I get frequent anxiety attacks. I have lost a lot of weight in the last couple of months for no reason at all. I feel hungry but after eating I feel nauseated. I'm wondering now if my childhood sexual abuse has anything to do with my present situation. If so, how can I start feeling better?

--Sara

The best way to determine whether your childhood sexual abuse is contributing to your present condition -- and, more important, to improve your quality of life -- is to seek out a licensed therapist with whom you can explore and address your questions in depth.

I also recommend getting a complete physical to rule out any medical condition that might be contributing to your weight loss, nausea, etc. While it's possible that those symptoms could be caused by depression and anxiety (which might be rooted in your childhood sexual abuse or in other experiences), some medical conditions have symptoms that mimic those of psychiatric or emotional disorders. Thyroid problems, for instance, can cause depression and weight gain, or anxiety and weight loss. (Even if a medical condition is found to contribute to the weight loss and nausea, though, I'd still recommend consulting with a therapist about the other issues.)

Could your childhood sexual abuse be related to your current problems? Possibly. It's worth pursuing with a therapist. But please keep in mind that the main focus of your therapy should be resolving your present-day difficulties: possible depression and anxiety (making sure to check out your physical condition), relationship problems, etc., -- NOT only talking about past sexual abuse.

I know it took courage for you to write about something you've never told anyone about. I'm glad you took the chance, and I wish you well as you continue to explore and address these issues.