Does Love Add Pounds?

By:
Michele L. Fagan

Reviewed By:
Susan Janoff, MS RD LD/N

It happens every time. You're single, eating healthy and working out. Your body is sleek and sexy. You feel like a goddess everywhere you strut. Then you find that special someone you've been looking for. And that's when it all falls apart. There are the bottles of wine shared over extravagant candlelit dinners. You consistently decide to spend time with Mr. Sexy instead of hitting the gym. One thing follows another, and your figure suffers. The first bulge is subtle. You can blame it on bloat. But then, suddenly (or seemingly so), you go up a size and start feeling more like Queen Frump than the sexy woman you know you are.

It's inevitable. New relationships revolve around food. Dates at restaurants tempt you to eat not just oversized, multiple-course meals. Perhaps you indulge in a glass or two of wine. And don't forget dessert. This focus on food makes sense: You communicate over the table. There, you can spend hours exploring the fabulous qualities of the man sitting across from you. And all the while, you take a nibble here and a sip there.

Stop right there! Refocus your activities. Instead of planning a date at a restaurant, get physical. There are many active pastimes couples can partake in while allowing a relationship to grow. Instead of sitting and dining, take a hike (literally). It doesn't have to be long ‑- you can even plot a destination to stop for a healthy snack. A bike ride, either out in the wilderness or down a quiet road will burn some calories and allow you to chat. Or try a sport. You don't need to know how to play; you can learn together. Tennis and volleyball are two fun activities to get the blood flowing. If your guy is up to it, learn to dance. Nothing is sexier than the salsa. Whatever the activity, the important thing is to refocus. Don't allow all your interactions to revolve around food and alcohol.

Consider working out together. Yes, that's what I said. Go to a fitness center and spend time there as a pair. Have a talk with your significant other to ensure the plan is suitable for both of you and to decide what you'll do when you get there. You may choose to work the same routine. In that case, just modify the exercises to fit your ability. He could be great motivation to give you that extra push! If you decide to do your own routines, enjoy sharing the space. You will have opportunities to chat, give secret looks and possibly even offer your guy a spot. If you part for resistance-training routines, hook up for cardio or even flexibility training. Couples stretching is a great way to get close. A fitness center is a prime place to spend time with your significant other, so set a date and hit the gym!

Of course, we know you can't spend all your time playing and racing and pumping iron. When you're dating, dining out is going to happen. On the occasions when you find yourself at a restaurant, make wise choices. It's one thing to go out once a month and indulge. It's another to go out two or three times a week and do the same. First things first ‑- that delicious warm bread that's so tempting? Remove it from the table. Here are two reasons why: One, the extra calories will ultimately end up on your hips, and two, you don't want to fill up on something you can buy at a local bakery. Next, as you scan the menu of glorious mouthwatering food, be aware of sauces, especially when the description says "smothered in." Strike sauce-laden choices from your mental menu immediately. Instead, focus on lean proteins. Often, meals come with a vegetable and a carbohydrate to complete your dietary needs. Many restaurants, especially high-end ones, will substitute healthy choices if requested. It doesn't hurt to ask!

No matter how you decide to spend your dates, communication is the key. Talk to your guy and make plans that will be fun for both of you and will enhance your lifestyles. It won't just save your figure ‑- it'll nourish your relationship.

For more information on dieting and dating, visit the Ask the Diet Psychologist message board.