Dear Lynn:

I am 27 years old and extremely overweight. It started in high school and kept increasing from there. A year before I got married, I decided to lose weight. My doctor gave me some pills, and I lost 40 pounds; when I stopped the pills, I lost 10 more pounds. Two months later I learned I was pregnant and quickly gained the weight back. After my second baby, my weight became a MAJOR problem. My husband has been overweight, but when he enrolled in the police academy he quickly lost it all. My problem is that when I lost the weight before, I had my mom to support me, and now I only have my husband, and he isn't that good. He has the best intentions but lets me slip up because he wants to enjoy junk food himself every once in a while. I need some advice on how to keep motivated. I am afraid I will not be here long enough to see my children grow up if I don't get help soon.

--zkbeals

Dear zkbeals:

It certainly appears that you are ready for action NOW. Try these suggestions:

1. Read everything you can about weight control, but make sure it's from a reputable source, such as the folks here at iVillage.

2. Use the Food Pyramid to structure your meals and snacks.

3. Start moving! Get at least 30 minutes of activity every day. That means more activity than you now have -- it can be walking, using an aerobics tape or dancing around the house with the kids.

4. Keep a journal. Write down when you eat, what you eat and why you eat. Look at it objectively and compassionately. You're doing this not to beat yourself up but to understand your eating patterns. If you're eating because of stress, figure out some ways to reduce stress without eating. Perhaps meditation, exercise, a five-minute break will work. If you need help with the kids, share time with a friend if your husband is not available; hire a sitter; or enroll them in an activity so you have time to yourself.

5. Think positive! Instead of viewing these changes as negative, look at them as steps toward a healthier, more energetic you.

6. Keep coming back here for support, encouragement and pats on the back. We've got them all.

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