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Friends with Benefits: How Pals Keep You Healthy
Reviewed By: It's often tempting to vegetate at home in front of the TV or computer screen. But consider what doctors say is key to staying happy and healthy: socializing. Research shows that not staying connected poses similar risks to your health as high blood pressure, obesity and even smoking. As staggering as that is, a trend toward smaller social networks and fewer close confidants is growing. "More Americans in the last 20 years say that they have fewer close friends or people in their lives with whom they can discuss important matters," says Duke University sociologist Lynn Smith-Lovin. "What ties to a close-knit group of people does is create a safety net." Doctors agree, and say that a good chat or a regular girls' or guys' night out can do even more. "Feeling cared for and supported within a social network is particularly important for women in fostering self-care," says Todd Jackson, PhD, author of a 2006 study linking high levels of social support and community involvement with healthier diet, exercise and sleep habits, among other positive effects. Think of it as a new kind of "friends with benefits" -- health benefits. Here's how the buddy system works to bring about a happier, healthier you: Motivation: You know how far just a tiny push can go when buying a new handbag or deciding to pursue that dream job. Having a cheerleader on hand when your workout regimen seems next to impossible is a proven strategy for maintaining a healthy exercise routine. In fact, participants in a 2005 New England study who exercised with a partner lost significantly more weight than those who did it alone. Their weight loss after the first six months: at least 10 percent, for both partners. Support: Not only are you more inclined to turn to food when feeling lonely -- a diet sabotage -- but the therapy you get from talking through everyday problems with a friend can ward off more serious ones like depression or insomnia later, explains Michael Wetter, PsyD, chief of adult psychiatry at Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in Hayward, California. What you get when you don't release your feelings regularly is a balloon-like effect where stress builds up and blood pressure rises, eventually triggering a number of negative consequences, including moodiness and poor sleep. The toll it can take on you physically could end up being far worse than your initial worries. Accountability: In Jackson's study, women who reported more consistent connections with family and friends were also more likely to keep up with routine medical appointments, a finding that might explain why social connectivity has also been shown to reduce the risk of chronic illness and diseases such as cervical cancer in some women. The friends you keep are more than just a byproduct of where you work or grew up; they are actually a survival mechanism, Dr. Wetter notes. Tom Hanks' desperate attempt at companionship with a volleyball in the movie Cast Away is an example Dr. Wetter uses to explain how friends are necessary for physical and mental well-being. That sense of connection, experts say, develops after about a month of regular interpersonal contact, and can be nurtured in as little as 15 to 30 minutes a day. Brief chats with a friend or alone time with a spouse three to four times a week can do as much to boost your health as physical activity. Even being in a crowded room with strangers can do the trick. So if you don't have a strong social network where you live, taking public transportation or heading out to a coffee shop with a good read may have a similarly soothing effect. Connect with others: Get support and helpful advice from YourTotalHealth’s dozens of message boards -- try Self-Esteem Support, Finding Your Best Life, Heart Health and many others.
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