My husband and I are trying to conceive a baby on New Year's Eve. Are there any positions that are better than others for conception? --R

Dear R:

First, I commend you for this lofty goal. However, that is a lot of pressure to place on yourself and your husband. The question of using specific sexual positions for creating conception is an interesting one. To ensure conception, I want to recommend some tried-and-true methods.

Be sure that this is a fertile period for you. That's step one. That period usually occurs mid-cycle, of course, or between the 11th and 16th day of your cycle (depending on the length of your cycle), starting with the first day of your last menstrual flow. If this works into the schedule for New Year's Eve, then you have passed the first test. Second, your husband must have ample and viable sperm to impregnate you. Sometimes a urologist will suggest that a man abstain from ejaculating, even from masturbation or partnered sex, for at least one to two weeks before the designated "event" time. I assume that both of you have been medically evaluated for your ability to conceive, impregnate and carry a developing fetus to term. If not, be sure that you have a complete gynecological work-up, so that you are really ready for this moment, physically, mentally and emotionally.

As for sexual positions, use the kind of positions that allow ample ejaculatory propulsion. No, this isn't rocket science. However, you want to have the most velocity possible for his seminal fluids to go directly to the cervical opening of your uterus for easy access and speedy delivery. Those positions might include your lying on your back with your legs in the air (wrapped lovingly around your partner's shoulders), if you can sustain such a tilted pose. You should avoid the types of body placement that facilitate flow out of your vagina. For example, in the woman-on-top positions, you will maximize the flow downward, out of you, rather than promoting quick and successful entry to the cervix.

Even in the side-by-side position, facing each other, you will have a better chance of preserving the ejaculate inside you. The best video on this is available at my site (www.yoursexcoach.com), Complete Guide to Sexual Positions.

Practice a few of these types of different styles for lovemaking, and make sure you allow for the natural course of life to be your primary guide. By telling yourselves that this is up to the divine, not human, course of events, you may alleviate the pressure that you and your hubby will undoubtedly experience in trying to get this right. Ease up on this as a "have to" and try to enjoy this as another wonderful adventure in your marriage, one that you two can smile about into the new century, with or without a new baby. Now, put on your party hats, take out your horns, roll out the bubbly and get busy.